God's Design for Marriage

“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”

 Ephesians 4:2-3, NIV

We live in a world where divorce is more common than probably anyone would like to admit. People and marriages are breaking. Children are struggling to have good examples of what marriage and life should be.

I can remember being a newly-wed in our small apartment. We had been married and living together for probably less than two months when we got into an overblown argument about whether the syrup should go in the pantry or the refrigerator. On top of the feelings of frustration and confusion about the situation at hand, I remember thinking, is this really what marriage is? Is this what marriage should be? From that moment on, I felt God’s tug on my heart to pursue a purpose and goal for our marriage. I wanted it to be more than something we did because we had to. I wanted it to ultimately make us better...together. I wanted it to be for God’s glory.

Because of this conviction, I eventually found the newlywed group at our church. Its purpose was to help guide newly engaged and newly married couples through conversations and scriptures to create a Godly foundation for marriage. I am forever thankful for this group and the lasting impact it has had on us. Among the amazing foundation it gave us, it provided amazing friends and, for me, other women who are now navigating motherhood together. On top of that, I now believe more than ever how important it is that our marriages are guided, encouraged, and purposeful for God’s kingdom.

Marriages are God given and become a model for how to live and love like Christ. Not only is it important for us as a couple to have a strong Godly marriage, but it is also one of the biggest ways we can have an impact on the world around us. How we show love, encourage our spouses, model navigating life’s painful or disappointing moments are all opportunities for God to be seen by others around us. Our children, future children, or children we interact with regularly (such as nieces, nephews, friends’ children, etc.) are all watching how we live in Christ or if we don’t.

God calls us to be an example to the world, not only as individuals but also for what marriage should look like. Ephesians 5:25 (NIV) says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her”. As a wife, Proverbs 31:11-12 (NIV) says, “Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”

We should always be pursuing our relationship with God first and foremost. But our second biggest goal and calling should be to create and maintain the strongest, faith-based marriage possible. Will it be easy...of course not! Our marriage can be our biggest challenge to our ability to give love and grace like Christ. We will frustrate each other, push each other, and it can quickly become a foothold for the devil. But let’s commit to pursuing God in our marriage. Pray that God will help you be the spouse he calls you to be and that those around you will see His glory through your life together.

 

“So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let no man separate.”

 Matthew 19:6, NIV

Casey Wayne

Monthly Contributor